Looking for the back button...

Not the one on the browser.
The waaaaaaay back button.
35.2 +/- 0.1 years should just about do it.

Permalink Wednesday, 8 July, 2009 9:38 pm, by Mamma Email , 17 words, Categories: Anxiety & stress ,

Remembering Nonno

Today is the twenty second anniversary of my Nonno’s passing. It seems so long ago now, and it’s almost two thirds of my lifetime ago, but there are some things that stay in memory better than others.

Every year this day comes and I think of him especially, as I will in four days’ time on his birthday. He would have been seventy-five that year.

Today I have been thinking extra hard about him, as the weather is one of those associated memories. It’s been raining, both here in Brisbane and down the coast where I grew up, and where he lived. There is flooding around parts of Brisbane, and in Lismore they are bracing themselves.

Twenty two years ago, in Lismore, they were recovering from the “Mother’s Day Floods”. My Nonno lived out of town, and as many older Italians do, had ignored the symptoms of the illness that had had been developing. As the flood waters were rising, Nonno was getting sicker. As the roads became blocked, it grew urgent. He was ferried to the hospital via SES emergency boat. His photo made front page of the local paper, which probably annoyed him more than anything, but he would have been too ill to bother too much.

I tried to find that photo online tonight, but have so far come up with nothing. I’m not even sure I want to. The thought of finding that photo scares me a little, and makes me a little sad. It’s the last mental image I have of my Nonno. He spent some time in hospital, but I wasn’t allowed to see him. Understandable, in retrospect. I was twelve. He would have been weak, pale, attached to whatever tubes and machines they would have hooked up, and a shadow of his usual, larger than life, loud, passionate self. Much better to remember him as the strong, loud, sometimes scary, always lovable, grandfather in the photos and memories that remain.

I don’t remember the date he went to hospital. I do remember that he survived his surgery, then suffered a heart attack in recovery. I guess the strain was too much. I remember being picked up after school, asking my parents how it went. I remember them being annoyed, hurried, telling me to get in the car before asking questions. I don’t remember if he was already gone by then. I don’t even remember if it was still raining that day.

The things that stay in your mind…

Thinking tonight of all people who are dealing with the wild weather, especially any who are sick and agonising about going out in the weather to seek help or treatment. It’s scary at the best of times, let alone on a night like tonight.

Permalink Wednesday, 20 May, 2009 11:55 pm, by Mamma Email , 459 words, Categories: Weather, Thoughts, Health ,

I was supposed to...

I was supposed to get so much done while DH was on days off. I had so many plans.

I was going to ride my bike, and try to go further distances while there was somebody at home to be with the kids. We went away for a few days, then had a (scheduled) day at the hospital. Then both kids and I got sick. So that wiped out the rest of the week. Today I’m feeling a bit better. The boys are back to normal.

I was going to clear the laundry that piled up over the days of rain. I did some of it just before we went away. DH did a lot of it while the rest of us were sick.

I was going to do some major decluttering and cleaning of the house. I’m not even sure what happened to that plan…

I was supposed to help (until I got sick) with the music at a relative’s funeral today. He was buried on my uncle’s fourth anniversary. It’s also the birthday of the daughter (and former friend) of FLOG. I haven’t told DS, as it seems that he has finally moved on. A day of so many endings. Of course, I believe that death is only an ending for this life, and that there is a new beginning beyond that. And I’m beginning to believe that there are also new beginnings beyond failed friendships. But April 17 is starting to be one of “those” dates.

So apparently I have precisely two days left to redeem myself. DH goes back to work on Monday, unless he’s too sick. I wonder if it’s too much to ask for a fine day tomorrow. How far do you think I could ride after a week off the bike?

Permalink Friday, 17 April, 2009 3:48 pm, by Mamma Email , 297 words, Categories: Motivation, Health, Bike ,

Eleven dolphins???

So I went for a bike ride this morning. By myself. Rode as fast as I wanted to. Came home feeling fantastic! I had even temporarily forgotten about my neck/shoulder/back pain. I wanted to go out again.

I commented to my DH “Gotta love endorphins!” Apparently, I rattled this off rather quickly and with less clarity than was required.

He replied “Got eleven dolphins???”

I talked to him a couple of minutes ago about something, and commented that I was sore again. He commented that the dolphins must have gone away.

Maybe I should go back out and look for them!

Permalink Saturday, 11 April, 2009 1:32 pm, by Mamma Email , 101 words, Categories: Thoughts, Health, Bike ,

Killing it softly (with apologies to Ms Flack)

OK, you know the tune. I’m in a bit of a silly mood. But anyway, word of warning - this is about the thing on my forehead. Actual details here. The “song” makes more sense that way.

He said “We’ll have to treat it, looks like a BCC.
It’s too inflamed right now, but it looks like one to me.
I’ll test it in two weeks. See you then”

And now I’m making a paste out of bicarb,
Smearing the paste on the bump,
Killing it softly with bicarb,
Killing it softly with bicarb,
Watching it oozing and shrinking,
Killing it softly with bicarb…

He said “You can’t freeze these ones, what doctor did you see?”
Rolling his eyes and thinking “typical GP!”
“The most effective treatment is just to cut it out”

But I’m making a paste out of bicarb,
Smearing the paste on the bump,
Killing it softly with bicarb,
Killing it softly with bicarb,
Watching it oozing and shrinking,
Killing it softly with bicarb…

“There’s this expensive treatment, a cream to kill the beast.
It works quite well, for four in five cases at least.
But if it fails in your case we’re back to surgery”

So I’m making a paste out of bicarb,
Smearing the paste on the bump,
Killing it softly with bicarb,
Killing it softly with bicarb,
Watching it oozing and shrinking,
Killing it softly with bicarb…

The bicarb (sodium bicarbonate) idea came to me after writing the other post. While we were researching alternative ideas for treating DS, a lot was mentioned about alkaline terrain being inhospitable to cancer. I know I’m generally on the acidic side (and I’m sure there’s a clever remark in that, but I’m too tired), and figured that between alkalinising my diet more (giving up coffee helps too) and using bicarb topically, it was at least worth a try before going back to the doctor. After developing the theory and the plan, I actually found online references to a doctor who uses bicarb (often high doses intravenously) to treat cancer (including skin cancers). He’s also criticised by many for his methods, as is usually the way with alternative practitioners, but it was enough backup for me to try my way - which seems to me to be pretty harmless whether or not it works.

So anyway, I’ll spare you the really gross photos, but if you want to see some progress shots, they’re on the next page.

Read more »

Permalink Thursday, 9 April, 2009 2:15 pm, by Mamma Email , 624 words, Categories: Medical tests, Health ,

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